Thursday, October 9, 2008

that's it!

time flies so fast. I attended my last lecture in NZ today.

Alhamdulillah, for the chance that has been given to me.

Thank you.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

the 2nd tutorial.

I went to the tutorial quite early this week because I was a bit late last week (that's because my tutor watch is faster than mine but mine is exact). I was trying not to repeat the same mistake but the world did not agree with me that morning...

Things happen when we least expect them.
There was a tutorial held in our classroom and my tutorial mates, the tutor and I entered the classroom , TOGETHER after 9 o'clock (the tutorial is scheduled at 9a.m). So, my effort of going to class early that morning was meaningless. It's not that we will get something if we turned up early, but I just felt what I did was pointless. Naaaah..., doesn't matter!

I sat next to Annabelle but then my tutor asked to get into group based on the number given to us. I got into group with Hermione or Annysse and a guy whom I thought was like me, a non-native speaker of English. My jaw dropped when I heard he spoke!he.he.. Luckily, I had a little chat with Annysse before we entered the classroom (I guess there's the silver lining of going to class early that day). She's nice and completely the opposite of what I had thought of her.

Then, we were asked to read some articles; my group got to read about realist opinion on international law. I was terrified because we had to discuss the article and aswered a few question later on. It was a 'classic' text and I couldn't really get it. Fortunately, it wasn't just me who had the problem, a girl who sat next to me couldn't understand it either. Mind you, she's Pakeha. In that class, I was the only one who is not a native speaker of English. Nobody else understand Bahasa Melayu than me!!!!!huhuhu.....very challenging indeed. This is because I'm not confident with my fluency and when I'm scared, I'll think too much and I can't talk!!!!!!in English of course...


I couldn't answer any questions that were based on the article. But I was able to share some thoughts when the questions asked about our personal opinion on international law. Huh!
But there's one thing that I regretted; I shouldn't object what Lauren said. Everybody was just giving their opinion and we were not looking for the best answer..hmm.......


The interesting that happened in this week tutorial was when I found out how native speakers of English having problem in explaining what they have read, just like me! It never occured to me that language was not the only barrier in learning, in this academic setting of course. In a way, this has helped me not to think less of my ability but I always need to work on my fluency because at the end of the day I'll be an English teacher.

"Look at problems as chance not obstacle"
-Mr. Fletcher-

till then...

with the slate wiped clean

too ambitious i guess. but that's what i always want and yet never achieve....

I used that idiom as the title for this blog before. Since it was never true, I shouldn't continue the lie, should I?

A few weeks ago, I had a chat with a taxi driver about god. He asked me whether I believe in god and I asked him back (a friend of mine told me, in order to keep a conversation going, ask question). He laughed and said, "I don't know....". He's a Samoan and a very nice guy indeed. Then last nite I rode his taxi again. I thought he didn't remember me, but he did. And I was scared because after dropping Riza off at her house, it was going to be just us. I didn't know what I was thinking, but I was just scared. But I arrived safe and sound and we had a little chat. He asked me about my study and he said:

"You know, it's not hard to study but it's hard when you don't study. Do you know what I mean?"

'Hmm.....yes...(I was thinking about the possibility of not having a good job if you don't have a good academic background)'

Then he explained it to me and I said 'oh, that's not really what I had in mind actually'

But what he said was completely true. Life would be easy if i kept it that way.
I'll remember this, thanks driver!



p/s:I think you readers (if there's any) are not as slow as I was to get what he meant. So I guess there's no need to explain it here.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Precious experience

Education : Public Lecture

Political Science and International Relations Research Seminar : Reconsidering US Policy Against Global Terrorism

Date: Tuesday, 15 July 2008
Time: 12-1.15 Venue: HM LT002
Address: Hugh McKenzie Building Kelburn Campus

A public lecture by Chris Heffelfinger, a researcher with the Combating Terrorism Centre at the U.S. Military Academy, West Point. He is also the editor of Unmasking Terror: A Global Review of Terrorist Activities and a frequent commentator for the Jamestown Foundation’s Global Terrorism Analysis.


...


Chris has said a few interesting that I would like to share here:

1. AL-QAEDA NEVER EXIST

2. WAR ON IRAQ IS A BIG MISTAKE

3. There isn't enemy in Iraq. But US invasion has created them.

4. Osama bin Laden is believed to be dead because we haven't heard anything from him for a long time.

5. Osama bin Laden is not the number one figure. But he has been the 'man' because he always appears and give messages. There are a few other names that is far more dangerous than him.

6. Bin Laden is charismatic but he is just a financier and not the strategist

7. Palestine is Muslim's third sacred place (what I'd like to point out is, he admitted that, means what Israel does is wrong)

8. Islamic World could lobby Washington as what the Isaelists do (so we might have the chance to change their policy on Palestine and Israel)

9. Chris would never engage in media because for him media has their own agenda and they are indeniably have big influence on how people around the world perceive Islam.


#that is pretty much of what I found to be shocking and very sincere that come out from Chris. Not because he seems to be on our side, but because we know, Islam never ever promotes violence and terrorism. Jihad, that we are encouraged to practice is not the jihad as what has been perceived by them, the terrorist.

p/s: there's much more to talk about this matter, and it'll be in the next post.


till then...

Sunday, July 13, 2008

First tutorial

I went to the tutorial at 9 o'clock this morning. When I entered to the class, I took a sit next to a girl.. scanning around, them saw a few items; IR textbook etc which I thought belong to my tutor. I thought he was out at that moment, when he was actually mingling around with other students. I didn't realize it until he called out for them to swap again (from the people they were talking to).

The first person I knew from that tut was Annabelle, she's from Sydney, 19 years old and in her first year. Than Matt and Jack. Both of them are in first year as well. I think majority of the class are in their first year because this is a 100-level paper.

I told Annabelle that I was scared coming to this class without my friends, and she said "nah, u'd be fine".

I gave a little opinion on Burma, not sure whether I have said a right thing, but I did say something....so I guess, it wasn't too bad for a start.

Then, I went to the lecture with Annabelle and sat next to her. I don't really like that sit, so tomorrow I'm going to sit at my favourite sit again....

till then...

Why this course?

In this new trimester, I'm taking INTP 113-Introduction to International Relations.
I wanted to take this course since last year. But I was afraid to do so, because I'd be the only one from C3 to study this course. Besides, that was my first year in New Zealand and I wasn't that confident to be without my C3 friends in a course. I was determined early this year to take this course because I like it. But, for me to like something, is to know that thing first, and the only thing that I knew about this course, was just its name....and it sounded 'cool' to me...

But why?
1- I like it. There's no other course that I'm interested to take.
2- I wanna study it. I wanna know how scholars and academics look at international issues. As before this, I knew about all these stuff from newspaper and newsreport and I think there's possibility for them to be biased. So from this course, I think I'll know more neutral opinions on international issues.
3- I wanna know, what happen when I do thing that I claim to like?Will I work hard on it?
4- This course is the introduction and if this is truly my passion, maybe I can continue it in the future. Well, at least I have the basis and will know for sure that this is what I wanna do.


p/s: I have passed going to the lecture alone, and tomorrow (this morning,actually) is my first tutorial. Wish me luck!

till then...